Coffee and Cheesy Poofs
by Anaya Doitici Orewid
Summary: Discontinued. Tweek shows up at the Cartman residence in the middle of the night. Who knows what that visit will lead to?
1. Once Upon A Night

Hey! First chapter of my first South Park fanfiction, like, ever. I'm not _entirely_ sure where I'm taking this story along, but ofcourse I'll do my very best for any possible readers this story may attract. Aaaand just to add, the title credit of this chapter goes to one of my closest friends. Much hugs to him.

**Disclaimer: **Blabla, you've heard it all before, South Park - ofcourse - belongs to Matt Stone and Trey Parker.

* * *

The streets of South Park were filling up with rain as it kept pouring down from the skies. In that rain ran a boy, a blonde boy. Soaked from top to bottom, running as if his life depended on it. His breathing was irregular and his heart was racing, but the boy refused to pause.

At least, until he reached a familiar house. He ran up to the door and shakily rang the doorbell, hoping someone would open, even at this hour. A light went on in an upstairs room while the boy still stood outside, shaking in the cold, far from properly dressed for the snowy South Park weather. The blonde boy jumped a few inches back, startled, as the door slowly opened.

In the doorway stood a heavyset boy, in his pyjamas, looking rather sleepy. Leaning against the doorpost, he rubbed his eyes and stared at the blonde boy on his doorstep.

"Tweek? What the fuck are you doing here?" said Eric Cartman, followed by a yawn.

Tweek didn't reply, he merely stood there shivering and looking around as if afraid that something might jump out of nowhere and attack him if he didn't look. Cartman yawned again and raised an eyebrow, then repeated his question on a slightly more irritated tone.

"Tweek, what the fuck are you doing here, you coffee-crazed asshole!"

Tweek twitched and spoke at a quick pace, "C-can I please come in? Please?"

He attempted to give a pleading look, but more or less failed due to his jittery manner. Cartman sighed and mumbled "fine, come in. If you catch your death out here I'll be blamed for it anyway."

Tweek gave him a twitchy smile as a 'thanks', which resulted to Cartman rolling his eyes.

Cartman made a 'come in'-gesture with his arms. "Are you gonna come in or do you want to be the first human snowman?"

"N-no! I don't! Could that really happen?! Ergh!" Tweek mumbled, more to himself than to Cartman as he stepped into the house. He fumbled with the end of his left sleeve as Cartman shut the door, after which he walked straight past Tweek into the living room. Tweek twitches and followed Cartman out of the hall. When he entered the room he saw that Cartman had already made himself comfortable on his couch, staring at Tweek with a somewhat questioning look. Tweek felt uncomfortable by this and twitchingly asked "Agh! Why are you looking at me like that, dude?!"

Cartman cleared his throat and started speaking in his infamous 'business-man'-like tone.

"Well, Tweek, I would like to know what the fuck you're doing in my house at three in the goddamn morning. Because, quite frankly, you should consider yourself lucky I even opened the door for you."

Tweek sat down on the other end of the couch but jumped up again before he barely touched the cushion. "Is it okay if I s-sit here?" he asked nervously.

"Yes, Tweek, sit down."  
Tweek did as said and began speaking, his words interrupted by twitching every so often. "W-well… I was walking outside and-"

Cartman cut him off. "Why the hell were you even outside, shouldn't you sleep, you fudgin' fruitcake?"

"Erm," Tweek began, "I don't really sleep… I told you that years ago…"

"Well _sorry _for not remembering every little detail of- oh goddamnit, is that what this is all about?! Did you get me out of bed for some fucking gnomes?!"

Without warning, Liane Cartman appeared in the doorway leading from the hall, wearing only lingerie and a see-through robe. "Poopseekins, is everything alright? I heard you raise your voice - oh! Who's this? Is one of your little friends spending the night?"

"I'm fine mehm, this is Tweek. Now go back to bed, mehm!"

"Alright, sweetums. If you need mommy you know where to find me."

"Yes mehm, now go to bed!" Cartman said, saying the word 'mehm' in a whiney tone. Once she left the room and went back upstairs, Cartman focused his attention back on Tweek, who seemed to be near a nervous breakdown.

"I-I'm sorry Cartman… I was scared… and your house was nearest and argh! Don't be mad!" Tweek tugged at a strand of his hair, accidentally pulling some out in the process.

Cartman rolled his eyes and got up from the couch. "Wait here, Tweek."

He walked up the stairs, leaving Tweek alone in the fairly dark room.

Hardly three minutes later Cartman returned holding a bundle of cloth under his arm and tossed it at Tweek.

"Put that on and get your ass upstairs. First room to your right." And with that, Cartman returned upstairs.

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A minute or so later, Tweek appeared in Cartman's room wearing a t-shirt obviously too big for him and sweatpants that refused to properly remained in place, but they would have to make do because Tweek's own clothes were still soaked from the rain.

Cartman, sitting on his bed, tossed a pillow in Tweek's direction, not caring if he caught it or not. "There's a blanket in that closet. Goodnight."

Cartman climbed on his bed and crawled under the covers, facing the wall.

"But C-Cartman, I don't sleep…"

"GO TO SLEEP, GODDAMNIT!"

"Argh! O-okay! Sorry!"

Tweek quickly got the blanket Cartman mentioned, and shoved some of Cartman's belongings aside carefully. He placed the pillow on the floor, laid down and attempted to calm down and fall asleep.

He ended up staring at Cartman's ceiling all night.

* * *

Howdy, Anaya again. Hoping you remotely liked this first chapter. ANY reviews at all will be _immensely_ appreciated and will motivate me to write more. Regardless of reviews or not I'll keep writing, but if nobody at all shows interest in this story I see no point to keep posting it further.

Suggestions, flames, one-word reviews are all okay by me. :) Also, I had a little question, I've been lurking around for a while now and stumbled upon the word "Style", what does that mean? Is it some type of writing? Anywho, please let me know and I hope you enjoyed this (_rather short, sorry for that,_) first chapter of Coffee and Cheesy Poofs!


	2. Breakfast Time

Hey! Chapter two of my little CartmanxTweek fanfic. I was really surprised at the positive reactions this got! Honestly, I was amazed I got any reviews at all. So, much love to my reviewers, I hope to read from you again in the future. Also, thanks for clearing up the "Style" thing, I can't believe I didn't figure that out myself. I don't remember who it was at the moment that said it, but the "Buttman" comment had me laughing for like 15 minutes. I have a childish sence of humor sometimes. Oh well. Enough with the chitchat, I'm sure y'all want to get on with reading. Maybe.

Oh, and I know it's a bit of a spoiler, but Kenny appears in this, and I decided to add the 'translation' of the Kennyspeak in _italic,_ for those who might like that sort of thing.

**Disclaimer:** South Park belongs to Matt Stone and Trey Parker. As if you didn't know that already ¬¬.

* * *

The night had gone very slowly for Tweek Tweak as he lay on Eric Cartman's floor. It was surprisingly comfortable, but after two hours of non-stop thinking his little mind started taking weird turns and thus he decided to examine Cartman's room. He couldn't really see anything in the dark. The only think he was absolutely certain he recognized correctly were the bed on which Cartman himself was sleeping upon and Cartman's desk and chair. At home, Tweek would find other things to do during the night. But he was too terrified of waking Cartman up for the second time that night to find anything to keep him occupied with. Tweek sighed softly, wondering what time it was. He didn't see an alarm clock, he thought Cartman might have one on the table next to his bed, but if that was the case, it was turned to face Cartman and Tweek was unable to see the time. He twitched, and moved so that he was lying on his side, to try and sleep – again – since Lord knows how long. 

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Poke, poke, poke. Nothing. "Tweek."

Harder this time. Poke, poke, poke. Again, nothing.

"TWEEK!" Response.

"Argh!" Tweek shouted. He had somewhat dozed off into a state between sleep and being awake and fully conscious.

"Come on, Twitchy. Mehm said breakfast is ready. Your clothes aren't dry yet so mehm wanted to keep you here until they are. Now COME ON!"

"Y-yes sir!" Tweek replied, quickly getting up, followed by a series of twitches as he went after Cartman.

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Arrived in the kitchen, they saw Mrs. Cartman cheerfully making some pancakes.

"Oh, hello Eric, how did the night go with your little friend?" she asked as she placed a mug of hot chocolate milk infront of her son.

"Fine mehm." He replied and started to softly blow on his chocolate milk to cool it down.

"Would you like some chocolate milk too…? Tweek, was it?"

"Ngh, I'd eh, rather have some c-coffee please… and y-yes, it's Tweek…"

"Alright then." Mrs. Cartman said, followed by a friendly smile to the twitching blonde.

Cartman took a sip of his chocolate milk and spat it out a nanosecond after, followed by a high-pitched girlish scream. He quickly put the mug on the table and leapt towards the sink. He turned on the cold water and let it fill his mouth and then spat it out again. He repeated this three times or so and stopped, glaring at his mother.

"Goddamnit, mehm! I burned my tongue on that fucking chocolate milk! Don't make it so hot!"

"I'm sorry, Eric. I'll put some cold milk in it for you to cool it down, sweetie."

Mrs. Cartman opened the fridge and took out a milk carton, once opened; she poured some milk into Cartman's mug, then placed it back in the fridge.

"Tweek?"

"Agh! – Er, yes Mrs. Cartman?"

"How do you take your coffee?"

"Erm, b-black is just fine Mrs. Cartman. Sometimes I drink tea. But my parents won't let me have any with sugar in it because they say it makes me even more hyper since I have ADD."

Cartman mumbled "addicted dumbass disorder" under his breath.

Mrs. Cartman set a mug of coffee on the table. Tweek grabbed it and greedily drank its contents. Cartman raised an eyebrow at him. Tweek had finished his coffee and put his mug down on the table and politely asked Mrs. Cartman for a refill.

After giving Tweek his refill of coffee, which he chugged down equally fast as the first, Mrs. Cartman set a plate of pancakes infront of each boy. Cartman grinned as he saw that his stack of pancakes was nearly twice as big as Tweek's. Mrs. Cartman knew, ofcourse, that her son has a bigger appetite than most.

Cartman and Tweek both reached for the syrup at the same the same time, causing their hands to touch briefly.

Tweek jerked his hand back with such a force that he shot into the back of his chair, causing the whole thing to fall on the floor with him on it.

Cartman started laughing loudly as Tweek rubbed his head and got off the floor. He raised the chair back to its original position and sat down again, his face turned as red as a tomato.

"Are you alright, Tweek?" Mrs. Cartman asked.

"Y-yeah, I'm fine…"

"Oh my God…" Cartman said, followed by more laughter. "That was great, Tweek! Excellent morning entertainment!" he wiped away some laughter-tears and poured syrup over his pancakes.

"You're such an idiot, Tweek." He said as he tossed the syrup at him. Tweek caught it and attempted to fake a small laugh. "Heh…er, thanks." He mumbled.

Mrs. Cartman left the room to do the laundry and to put Tweek's clothes in the dryer as the boys ate their breakfast. The rest of it was pretty quiet, aside from Cartman bursting spontaneously into laughter a few times over the previous event.

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The doorbell rang.

"MEHM!" Cartman shouted, "Mehm, someone's at the door!"

"Coming, hun." Mrs. Cartman replied, from the laundry room.

"The damn door won't open itself, mehm! Get your ass over there!"

"I'm here, sweetie." She said from the hallway as she walked to the door and opened it.

"Mnhp mphmph mmphmph." _(Hello Mrs. Cartman.)_

"Hello there." Mrs. Cartman said to the boy in the orange parka. "Eric! It's another one of your little friends!"

Mrs. Cartman led Kenny to the kitchen. He had been coming over for years, but Mrs. Cartman had made it a habit of doing that.

"Would you like some pancakes too, Kenny? Grab a chair and join in. You can sit next to Tweek."

"Mph mmph!" _(Yes please!) _He said enthusiastically and sat down as Mrs. Cartman had suggested.

"Mph mh mmph?" _(What's up guys?)_

"Just the usual, Kenneh." Cartman informed him. "Twitchy spent the night _myah_. How come you're so hungry, Kenneh? Didn't they feed you again at that poor-house?" he asked, more mockingly than genuinely caring.

"TWEEK!" Cartman said out of the blue.

"Argh! What?! What'd I do?!" He replied, in a panic.

"Tell Kenneh about that fall you made!" He started laughing again at the thought alone.

"Er, well – oh God – I – Cartman and I wanted to grab the syrup at the same time and – sweet Jesus! – I pulled my hand back and – ergh! – fell on the floor…"

Kenny laughed inaudibly in his parka, but continued eating his pancakes rather than remaining in a laughing fit Cartman had yet to get himself out of.

"Mph, mmmmph mph mmph?" _(So, shall we go then?)_

* * *

The end of another chapter! Sorry they're all on the short side, but this was already longer than the first chapter. Again, I'll keep writing whether I get reviews or not, but I did notice they are one hell of a motivation to write more and quicker. Review if you want, flame if you want, or don't leave anything if you want. All fine by me. :) 


	3. Stanless Stark's Pond

ReallyreallyREALLY short chapter, I'm so sorry. ;-; But the next one is longer, I'm working on it as we speak -- err, as I type -- but you get the picture. So, I hope this little chapter will keep you content untill I deliver the next one.

I also wanted to use this chance to give a thank you to **imjustagirl0077**, for having reviewed on both chapters of this story, hugs to you :)!

**Disclaimer: **Yadayadayada, South Park belongs to Matt Stone and Trey Parker. I wouldn't be spending my time creating poorly-written fanfiction if it was mine, would I?

* * *

Mrs. Cartman told Tweek his clothes were dry and he kindly thanked her for everything and went to put his clothes on, which he noticed were washed and ironed as well.

Tweek went back to the kitchen to say goodbye to Cartman, but saw he was already in the hall, fully equipped with a coat, gloves and his hat, followed by Kenny.

"C-Cartman?" Tweek began nervously. "I – ngh… – just wanted to thank you for letting me stay here…"

Cartman shrugged. "Thank my mehm. I would've kicked your ass out if she wouldnt've asked if you were staying over."

"Oh…"

"Mmp mmph!" _(Come on!) _Kenny called from outside. Cartman and Tweek both left the house, Tweek walking in one direction, Cartman in the other, with Kenny.

"Mmph, mh mp!" _(Tweek, wait up!)_

Tweek turned – well, jumped – around, followed by a twitch.

"Ngh! Y-yes?"

"Mm mph mnph mm mpm mphh?" _(Do you want to come with us?) _Kenny asked; which resulted in Cartman smacking him in the head yet again. Cartman lowered his voice slightly, but it remained loud enough for Tweek to flawlessly understand him.  
"AY! What the fuck do you think you're doing, Kenneh?!"

"Mmphmmph mph mphmph." _(Inviting him along.)_

Kenny walked over to Tweek and dragged him along, leaving Cartman dumbfounded and annoyed.

"KENNAY! You can't do this to meh! I am seriously! Kenneh!" He went on for a while, then decided to give up and followed Tweek and Kenny as fast as he could. He smacked Kenny against the back of his head again and stuffed his hands in the pocket of his red coat. "I hate you, Kenneh."

"Mmph mph." _(Fuck you) _Kenny replied casually.

"Ergh, h-hate to interrupt the loathing, but – ngh – where are we going?" Tweek asked.

"Mnph's mmph." _(Stark's Pond.) _

"O-okay…"

"God, Tweek, stop stuttering you little freak."

"Argh! I'm sorry! I c-can't help it." He said, shielding his head, afraid Cartman would hit him too.

"Then SHUT UP, twitch-boy!"

"Okay…"

A long silence fell, which was creeping Tweek out, so risking a beating by Cartman, he decided to just go and break it. "It was really nice of your mom to let me s-stay and eat breakfast and dried my clothes and everything…"

"Mph, mph mmph mphmmm's mph, mph?" _(So, you like Cartman's mom, huh?)_

"I guess s-so…" Tweek said, somewhat unsure what Kenny completely meant, especially since he started laughing.

"Mphmmm's mph's mnphnph mnmph." _(Cartman's mom's easy enough.) _he blurted out.

"AY! ARE YOU CALLING MY MOM A WHORE, YOU POOR SON OF A BITCH?!"

"Mmnmph mph." (Ofcourse not.) He replied sarcastically. Cartman glared at him, but decided not to act out on it any further.

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Once arrived at Stark's Pond, they saw Kyle sitting on a tree trunk by himself.

"Hey guys – oh, hey Tweek," Tweek twitched with hearing his name. "I didn't know you were coming too."

"Neither did I." he quietly replied.

"Well it's all Kenneh's fault Twitchy's here, Jew. Now I'm stuck with him even longer."

Kyle looked confused for a moment, but decided it was easier to just let it go. Tweek shivered, his clothes might be clean and dry, but they still weren't right for the cold South Park winters, which Kyle took notice of.

"Are you cold, Tweek? Do you want to stop by your house to pick up a coat or something?"

"No thanks, I'd rather listen to my parents' endlessly c-continuing interview about where I was last night later…"

"Alright, then."

"Come on, Kahl, let's go already!" Cartman impatiently sneered at him.  
"But Stan isn't here yet!" he protested.

"Aww, does the little Jew-boy miss his boyfriend?"

"Shut your fucking mouth, Cartman!" he shouted back at him, then turned to Tweek and Kenny. "Let's go pick Stan up at his house. If he left already we'll run into him on his way over here."

Kenny shrugged and said "Mph." _(Sure.)_ Tweek merely gave a nervous nod to show his approval to Kyle's suggestion.

* * *

C'est fini. For chapter three that is. Hope you enjoyed it, even if it was sinfully short. I'M SORRY, DON'T HURT MEEEE! 


	4. Finding Stan

OhmyGodanotherchapter. Just in case you were wondering, the whole CartmanxTweek thing WILL have it's way in the story, the Stan-drama is just fun. I can't believe how easily it goes to write about Kyle and Stan. It just comes so naturally. I guess that's 'cause they've already got a rock solid friendship as base for any type of relationship. But whatever, the rest of the story won't focus solemnly on Kyle and Stan, don't worry. :)

**Disclaimer:** South Park belongs to Matt Stone and Trey Parker. _Duh._

* * *

The group headed on to the Marsh's residence. The journey went on with no real drama. "There's Stan's house." Kyle informed them. They walked up to the front door and Kyle rang the doorbell. Sharon Marsh opened the door. "Hello boys, how can I help you?" 

"Hello Mrs. Marsh, is Stan here?"

"Stan? He left to hang with you boys about ten minutes ago. I figured he'd be with you by now."

"Hm, that's strange. I guess he just took a different route than we did, then. I'm sure he's fine."

"I hope so. Would you mind giving me a call when you find him, Kyle?"

"Sure thing, Mrs. Marsh. Bye then."

"Goodbye boys, enjoy your day."

Once they were certainly out of the Marsh's sight, Kyle dropped his 'everything's-just-fine'-face to make room for a more worried expression.

"Guys, I think something might be really wrong here. There is no way to Stark's Pond anywhere where we wouldnt've seen Stan."

"What're you implying, Jewlock Holmes?"

"That something happened to Stan! He wouldn't ditch us without a phone call, fatass!"

Tweek started to panic and began shaking. "Oh my God, dude! What if he got kidnapped?! Or raped?! Or – oh sweet Jesus – or what if he got murdered, man?!"

Cartman gave Tweek a tap on the back of his head. "Snap out of it, nutcase."

"S-sorry… I need some c-coffee, man!"

Kyle closed his eyes for a second to get his thoughts clear. "Okay… we'll go to Wendy's house to see if he might have gone there, on the way we'll pass by Tweak's Coffee. Kenny, you're going in to get it 'cause Tweek can't be seen by his father and I don't trust Cartman keeping his big mouth shut about him. Alright, Kenny?"

"Mphmh." _(Okay.)_

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Kenny stepped into Tweak's Coffee, where he was immediately greeted by Mr. Tweak.  
"Hello there, how may I help you?"

"Mh mph mnh mph mphmph, mphh." _(I'd like one black coffee, please.)_

"Excuse me?"

Kenny lowered the hood of his parka, exposing his beautiful blonde hair, which remained looking healthy regardless of the home he lived in being filthy.

"I'd like one black coffee, please."

"Alrighty, that'll be 2,50."

Kenny reached into his pocket and dug up the 5 dollars 'emergency coffee-cash' Tweek had given him and placed it on the counter. Mr. Tweak made the coffee and gave Kenny his change. Kenny took both, put the money back in his pocket, mumbled "thank you" and one-handedly put his hood back on.

Once outside again, he gave Tweek his coffee and held out his other hand with Tweek's change on it. Tweek seized the coffee and told Kenny to 'keep the c-change'. Kenny smiled at him, even noticeable with his hood on.

"Wow, Kenneh, you must feel rich now, huh?"

"Mph mph." _(Fuck you.)_

"Enough you guys, let's go find Stan!"

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They heard loud metal blasting from behind their old school as they came by it.

"Ack! S-such noise! How c-can anyone listen to that, man?!"

Kyle shrugged. "Probably the Goth Kids. They still hang out there. From what I've heard they never even bothered to find a new place to go, and that they scare little children."

"Hell I'd be scared too if some faggy Goth kid played their fucked up music near me too and had me listen to their poetry. I'd be scarred for life." Cartman added.

As they moved further away from South Park Elementary they heard less of the music, which seemed to brighten the overall mood of the boys.

"I hope Stan's at Wendy's…" Kyle mumbled as her house grew closer ahead of them.

"Quit yer bitchin', Jew. He probably just wanted some ass instead of having to listen to you all day."

Kyle was too worried about Stan to give Cartman's words a second thought, which annoyed him greatly. After a while he resorted to ripping on Kenny for being poor since Kyle didn't seem to give a reaction to anything whatsoever.

They were in Wendy's front yard now and once again it was Kyle who rang the doorbell. After waiting impatiently for 30 seconds or so, Wendy cheerfully opened the door, though somewhat surprised to see Kyle.

"Hey Kyle. What's up?"

"Hey Wendy, not much. I was just wondering if Stan is with you?"

Wendy's expression went from happy to dangerously icy.

"No. Sorry Kyle. He's not with me."

"Oh goddamnit… do you have any idea where he might be?"

"I don't know. But if you'll excuse me, I have things to do."

Without giving Kyle a chance to say anything else, Wendy slammed the door shut in his face without saying another word.

"Bitch." Cartman said.

"That was rude…"

"Why did s-she do that, man?!"

"I'm starting to get really worried about Stan, you guys…"

"Mh mph mp." _(He'll turn up.)_ Kenny said and put an arm around Kyle's shoulder to try to comfort him a bit.

"Don't be such a fag, Kenneh. And Jew, I'm sure your girlfriend will come falling out of nowhere soon."

Tweek twitched. "Maybe he got abducted by aliens, man! Or the gnomes took him and forced him into slavery! Argh!"

Kyle took a deep breath and sighed. "Let's go back to Stark's Pond. Maybe he's there by now." He half heartedly suggested.

On the way there Cartman was mumbling to himself. "Goddamn Stan… ruining my day… crossed half of town…" and so on.

They heard the Goth Kids' music being louder than before, to Cartman's great irritation. "Goddamn Goth Kids!" he complained. "I'm going over there and making them turn their fucking bullshit down!"

The four boys walked around to the back of South Park Elementary and stopped dead in their tracks. Kyle slowly reached for his cell phone and dialed Stan's home number. "Mrs. Marsh? Kyle Broflovski speaking. We found him."

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What they saw had by far not been what they had expected. Behind the school, on top of a blanket, lay Stan Marsh with his eyes closed, a portable CD-player and speakers on his right and a book on his left.

Kyle was the first to take any form of action and walked over to Stan. As he came closer he saw Stan was not only dressed in black from top to bottom but had also been wearing thick layers of makeup around his eyes, yet it was all ran out as if he had been in tears before. Kyle softly poked him in his side as he had sat down next to the sleeping boy. "Stan?" he whispered.

Stan's eyes slowly opened, for a moment he didn't quite realize where he was but it all came back to him as he sat up and looked around with a confused face.

"Kyle, what're you doing here?" Stan asked in a somewhat somber tone.

"Looking for you! We've crossed half the town to find you when you didn't show up at Stark's Pond."

"Oh… I'm sorry. It completely slipped my mind."

"What's gotten into you, Stan? This is so unlike you! Your mother was worried; she didn't know where you were. What's going on?"

* * *

In all honesty, the "Jewlock Holmes" comment kind of made me laugh. I don't know if anyone used it before, but it's still funny to me. And OH THE STAN-GOES-GOTH cliché! Harharhar! It's fun to write about, give me a break ;). Well I ran out of stuff to blab about here. Enjoy. :) 

Reviews, general comments, flames, suggestions - anything remains greatly appreciated. But I won't stop writing if I get none.


	5. Tweek Goes Home

Eeps, sorry for not posting anything so long!! I've been writing, just not typing and posting here. So sorry. Starting and preparing for school kind of got in the way. Thousand apologies, anywho, I'll try to start putting up chapters again regularly. Sorry agaaaainn!

**Disclaimer:** South Park belongs to Matt Stone and Trey Parker.

* * *

Kenny, Tweek and Cartman had now joined Kyle, all considerably curious to what was wrong with Stan. Stan looked at the other boys over Kyle's shoulder for a brief second.

"Wendy broke up with me."

Kyle made a "you've-got-to-be-kidding-me"-face at him. "Dude, again? That's like the forth time this _month_ alone! What made it so different this time that you decided to go all Goth again?"

Stan looked down at the ground. "Because I think she really meant it this time…"

"Stan, you say that every time she breaks up with you."

"This time isn't like the others, Kyle!" he snapped at his best friend, to his own surprise and Kyle's. "There was a pretty big fight. I think she genuinely hates me."

Kyle fell silent, making it an opportune moment for Cartman to make fun of Stan's heartache.

"Listen you idiot-gone-Goth, either you go crawling back to that hoe or you become butt-fuck-buddies with the Jew. In both cases it's a win-win situation for you, so quit yer bitchin'."

Stan gave Cartman a death-glare. "Fuck you, Cartman. You're an insensitive jerk. I hope somehow you get to know how this feels, and then ten times worse."

"Whatever, Stan. C'mon Kenneh." He said and walked off. Kenny doubted going after him for a moment, but decided to eventually.

"Tweek get your ass over here!" Cartman said from a distance.

"Argh, I'm sorry, you didn't say I had to c-come too!" he twitchingly spoke, hurrying after him.

Cartman shrugged. "I assumed you'd follow naturally. But apparently that's too much to ask from your little brain, Twitchy."

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"Cartman's such an ass…" Stan mumbled, sounding as if he would start crying again.

"He always is, don't let it get to you."

Stan rubbed his eye, smearing eyeshadow and mascara all over it. "Sorry dude, I don't know why this made me so… vulnerable. I feel like such a fucking pussy, y'know?"

"Let's get you home, Stan."

He nodded and started to pick up his blanket and got the snow off it, then folded it up and carried it under his arm. When he turned around he suddenly found himself in a tight hug from his best friend.

"Thanks, Kyle."

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"Mphmph, mph mh mh mphmh?" _(Cartman, where're we going?)_ Kenny asked. Tweek had wondered the same thing, but due to Cartman's temper, was afraid to ask.

"My house, ofcourse. I'm pretty damn sure that's the last place Jewboy and Gothy McFagfag will want to hold their assbanger's parade."

"C-Cartman?"

"Yes Tweek, what do you want?"

"Do y-you want me to come too or should I just go home now?"

"Don't care either way, Tweek. Decision's all yours."

"Oh… c-can I come then…?" Tweek asked quietly.

"I just said you could, dumbass. Pay attention."

"Sorry! I d-didn't mean to! I just… ngh – nevermind." Tweek said, turning red. He never had much friends and didn't hang out with others too much, so any chance he got, he decided to take it. Tweek smiled at the idea of getting a few friends, but stopped when Kenny took notice of his wide smile and gave him a funny look.

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"Mehm, I'm home." Cartman said as he opened his front door, yet he received no reply. He shrugged. "Guess she's not here."

"Mphmph mph's mph mp mh mphmph mph." _(Maybe she's out doing a photo shoot.)_

"Goddamnit, Kenny! Stop insulting my mehm, you poor piece of crap!"

Tweek didn't really understand what the insulting part was in Cartman's mom doing a photo shoot, so he just kept quiet as they entered the living room. Cartman tossed his keys on the table and left the room to hang his coat. Tweek didn't wear one to begin with, and Kenny didn't feel like taking off his parka, thus that left them alone for a moment. Kenny decided to make good use of the moment so give Tweek a speech about Cartman's mom and explaining how the joke implied she would be in Crack Whore Magazine. Again.

"B-but his mom is so friendly…"

Kenny shrugged, took his hood off and opened his parka, revealing a white t-shirt, yet he didn't take the orange parka off completely. He ran his right hand through his blonde hair, putting it a little bit into style as it had been under his hood almost the entire day.

"She's still a slut."

"Goddamnit, Kenneh!" Cartman furiously shouted at him, having entered the living room once again. "Look who's talking you poor hoe! Stop insulting my mother before I kick your ass!"

"Allright, allright." Kenny said. "Calm down."

"Um… c-can I maybe g-get some coffee?" Tweek asked nervously, not wanting to tick Cartman off even more than he already was.

"Yeah, go ahead and help yourself, Tweek. I guess you know how the coffee-machine works, you fucking addict."

"All that caffeine will kill you, you know." Kenny added in a casual tone. He seemed to be a lot more confident and talkative without that hood on.

Tweek jumped. "K-kill me?! What do you mean?!"

Cartman grinned. "It will jump out of your mug and swallow you whole."

Kenny laughed. "I meant that it's bad for you and can have permanent effect on your body in the long run."

"Oh…" Tweek mumbled. "Well one c-cup can't kill me, so I'll just have one. I can quit whenever I want."

He left to make coffee. Kenny looked at Cartman, who didn't seem to appreciate being oogled at.

"What do you want, Kenny?"

"Do you like him?"

"Who? What? What the fuck are you talking about, Kenneh."

"Tweek. If you like him. Since he slept over and everything."

Cartman gave him a look in return, which seemed to confuse Kenny for a second.

"OH!" he said. "Stop looking at me like that, Eric! I meant just as friends! Really."

"_Sure _you did, Kenneh." Cartman shrugged. "He's weird. I don't have much more of an opinion on him. He's like a background prop."

Kenny made a serious face. "Look, I don't want to sound like Kyle, giving speeches and all that, but Tweek's a good kid without too much friends. If you don't want to be his friend, let him down easy. You know; the opposite of how you usually would talk to people."

Kenny could be amazingly profound sometimes.

"Mind your own business, Kenneh. I'll treat him any way I want. Watch." He raised his voice so Tweek would hear him. "Tweek! Get me some Cheesy Poofs while you're in there!"

"O-okay!"

Cartman looked at Kenny again with a smug look on his face, Kenny merely 'whatever'd him and looked at the clock.

"Well asshole, I'm going home." He said as he closed his parka and put his hood back on. "Mph mphmph mph mh mphmph." _(It's almost time for dinner.)_

"Kay. Enjoy your poor-ass dinner."

Kenny left as Tweek jittered his way out of the kitchen holding coffee in one hand and Cheesy Poofs in the other, which he handed to Cartman and sat down on the couch, as far away from him as possible, not wanting to invade his 'personal space'. Cartman turned the television on and start eating his Cheesy Poofs. Every so often he'd burst into laughter so hard about Terrance and Phillip that he'd spit Cheesy Poof-bits all over himself. Tweek quietly sipped his coffee when he realized something.

"Oh my god! My parents! I haven't spoken to them at all! I'm s-sorry Cartman; I really have to get going. Thanks for everything."

"Yeah, see you around, Tweek." He mumbled, being completely absorbed in the TV-show.

Tweek stepped out of the house and closed the door behind him, smiling. His happy moment was quickly overshadowed by thinking about his parents' reactions when he'd get home. He didn't want to go home, but couldn't postpone it any longer. Tweek was so consumed by his thoughts that he almost tripped over the leg of a homeless man sitting on the sidewalk begging for change. Tweek absent-mindedly took his wallet out of his pocket and gave the man 3 dollars. He stuffed the wallet back in his pocket and quickened his pace as he walked. His house quickly grew closer in the distance.

Tweek now stood infront of the door and took a deep breath. "You can do this!" he assured himself and opened the door.

"Mom…? D-dad…? I'm home."

His mother came running out of the living room where she left behind officer Barbrady with a more puzzled look on his face than usual.

"Tweek, sweetheart! I've been so worried! Where were you?" she said as she tightly hugged her son, who gasped for air.

"Ngh – I'm sorry, mom! I slept over at Eric Cartman's and I forgot to call… I'm so sorry…"

Officer Barbrady made his leave. "Well everything seems to be in order here, I'll be moving along now. Good evening Mrs. Tweek."

Mrs. Tweek hugged Tweek again. "Never scare me like that again."

"I'm r-really sorry mom."

"Come on, it's time for dinner. Your father should be home any minute now. Why don't you go sit down and I'll make you some coffee?"

"O-okay mom…"

"Remind me to call Eric's mother later to thank her for having you."

"I will mom."

"Good, well then, I'll go make some coffee."

The front door opened and closed. "I'm home," Said Mr. Tweek. "Is Tweek back yet? How did it go with the police? I saw Barbrady in his car."

"Tweek's home, we're in the kitchen. Dinner is almost ready."

Mr. Tweek hung up his coat and entered the kitchen with a rather serious face. "Tweek, you had your mother and I _very_ worried. Where were you? What were you _thinking_?!"

"I w-was at Eric Cartman's…"

"What were you doing there?! You snuck out of the house in the middle of the night! God knows what kind of dreadful things could have happened to you!"

"I couldn't sleep, I went for a walk and… it started raining and his house was really close so I went there! I'm really sorry!"

"You were gone the entire day, Tweek! You should have called."

"I forgot, I'm sorry!" Tweek panicked.

"And you had nothing with you! No coat, no gloves, no nothing. And worst of all, no medication! You know how you get without it, Tweek."

"I'm sorry! I really am!"

"You're grounded for two weeks."

"Isn't that a bit long?" his mother interrupted.

"Fine, one week. Now," Mr. Tweak's voice had a calmer tone, "What's for dinner?"

* * *

Re-reading the last part, about Tweek and his father, actually struck me more as something that would happen to Butters over happening to Tweek, but oh well. Hope you liked it 


	6. Jittery Phonecall

Hey there. Please read this before you go on! - I know it's been a very long time since I've done anything to this story [quite frankly, this is still true.] but I can't make myself admit I've officially 'abandoned it'. I've actually thought about it often, and whenever someone reviewed or added it to their story alert, I felt a stab of guilt for not updating anymore. [And I'm the type of person that doesn't feel guilty.] _However,_ I had this already written out for a while and finally decided to get off my lazy ass, type it out and publish it. So here you go. I can't promise I'll continue soon, or finish it at all, but please see this chapter as some form of.. apology? I don't know. I'm so sorry D; 3.

* * *

Tweek grabbed the phone and nearly dropped it as he twitched while dialing the number. He jumped around nervously, hopping from one foot to the other until the phone was picked up at the other end.

"Eric Cartman speaking." Said an obviously uninterested voice.

"Hi C-Cartman… I-it's Tweek.. .agh!" he muttered nervously into the horn, trying to avoid dropping it again.

"The stu-stu-stutter kind of gave it away, Twitchenstein," Cartman answered, his eye-roll being practically audible. "What is it this time, Tweek, gnomes after your socks now?"

A yelp of panic. "Agh! They take socks too?! Oh my God – I mean, um, no. My parents are t-taking me to a r-restaurant this evening and – agh! – told me I c-could invite a friend, and – oh, man... – I um – ergh! – was wondering i-if you want to come with me…?"

Tweek nervously bit his nails and held the phone away from his ear slightly, as if an angry Cartman would jump out the listening-end and strangle him.

After but a moment of silence, which seemed forever to Tweek, Cartman spoke again, preceded by a slightly annoyed sigh.

"Why not. When are you going?"

Tweek jumped up happily, waving the phone around victoriously before realizing he still hadn't answered.

"Oh, uh… I think my p-parents wanted to go around 7-ish…"

"Okay Tweek. I'll be there. Anything else?"

"About those gno- um, no. Not really, no…"

"Alright. See you then."

"Agh! See you!"

Tweek listened until he heard the 'click' identifying that Cartman had indeed hung up the phone. Tweek smiled to himself, albeit a bit oddly, and went upstairs to find his mother.

"M-Mom?"

"Yes, Tweek?" she answered as she made her bed.

"I c-called Eric. He s-said he'd be here for dinner."

"Okay, then. Are you okay with having invited him? I suggested it as some sort of 'thank you' because you slept there. I'm sorry if you would've rather had someone else."

"It's alright m-mom! – Agh! – Eric's alright – I mean, I don't mind at all. I think we might be becoming friends." He pondered for a moment. "S-sortof."

"That's wonderful, Tweek. I'll bring you some coffee when I'm done making the beds, alright?"

"Great! Thanks mom."

"No problem, sweetheart."

* * *

On a quick side note - if anybody has ideas as to where I should take this - by all means, tell me, and perhaps I'll get inspired to go on. If there's any interest in finishing - or atleast writing more to this - by all means, go ahead, but please tell me, so I can enjoy it too. :)

Much love and more apologies, the guilttripping Anaya.


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